Last week my grandmother died. I had never seen anyone close to me pass before my eyes, and watching her die had a huge impact on me. It also changed my perspective on death and dying in general.
To symbolize my mourning, I tore a piece of fabric and pinned it onto my clothing. I've been re-pinning it onto whatever I wear and will continue to do so until I'm ready to take it off. Some people have asked me what it's for. I explain that the tearing of clothes used to be part of the traditional Jewish mourning process (I am black and Jewish). But now, in a more modernized version, people just tear a piece of cloth and pin it to their clothing.
Beyond grieving, I've come to realize that while some people may go their whole lives without witnessing death firsthand, others are faced with it everyday -- like the people who fight for their country.
In the same week that my grandmother passed, I went to the screening of 'Hell and Back Again,' a 2010 documentary by Danfung Dennis, which follows the US Marines Echo Company, 2nd Battalion, eighth Marine Regiment, as they launch a major assault on the Taliban stronghold in southern Afghanistan. Sergeant Nathan Harris is filmed as he returns home to his wife, badly injured.
The film doesn't take a political stance so much as it asks the viewers to form their own opinion on the many issues presented throughout. This shockingly real account shows one unit's reality, and the anguish amid a war that's rarely ever talked about anymore.
There has been U.S. military presence in Iraq and Afghanistan for almost 10 years now, yet it's still just an abstraction to most people. In the summer of 2009, Dennis was there working as a photographer for the 'New York Times.' It was not his intention to make a film. But fueled by the soldiers and his experiences with them, Dennis decided to combine the power of the still image with advanced technology to bring the viewer into that world.
The organization REACT to FILM put together the screening at the Soho House in New York City. It was a sunny, warm evening and I wasn't expecting to be hit so hard by the film. I am one of the many who rarely thinks about this war on a day-to-day basis. Having no loved ones or anyone I even know overseas, the topic of conversation is hardly discussed. And I knew then that this is how society becomes numb to inhumanity and the horrors of war.
I was spooked that not once in the film do you see the enemy, the Taliban, yet the violence is so traumatic. After Sgt. Harris returns home, the severity of his pain leads him to depend on painkillers. Watching his wife Ashley nurse, love and tend to such a wounded individual's physical, mental and emotional needs is both depressing and poignant. Our government provides physical care, but struggles to provide comprehensive mental health care for soldiers.
The film succeeds in conveying the extraordinary drama of war, and the no less shocking experience of returning home. A generation of Marines struggles to find its identity in a country that prefers to remain indifferent.
REACT to FILM screens documentaries to an intimate audience of press and tastemakers to encourage and engage discussions, and ultimately, to inspire people to make a difference.
The goal for this documentary, 'Hell and Back Again,' is that it be seen by the youth of America, and used as an educational tool to start a national conversation on the issue. If 16- and 17-year-old kids watched this film, I bet they would think long and hard before making the decision to enter the army.